Sinking
by DigiExpert
Summary: Aaeru struggles to come to terms with Mamiina's death. Neviril's words cannot console her completely, but a simple connection just might be a start...


**I'm back with yet another Simoun fic. This fic decided to take it's own course. It was originally intended to be Aaeru only, but didn't end up that way. Despite that, I'm pretty pleased with it. I think this would end my focus around episode 20, which really ticks me off more now since I've watched it so closely. There is just so much one might miss if not watching closely. It's like finding little easter eggs or something. Anyway, enjoy :)**

She finished preparing for the maaju pool, fingers shaking as she completed the last bit of the outfit. She wasn't sure where to turn, or what to do, but a heavy feeling weighed on her chest, and she didn't know what to do. Her body was still in shock. She'd seen a comrade dead before her, blood pooling around her body. It was different from seeing a lifeless enemy soldier. That in itself was upsetting, especially having to dismember the arm to retake the Simoun. However, the soldier was not a comrade, not a fellow Sibylla, not someone she lived with on a daily basis. Death had finally hit home, so to speak, and she was unsure of how to handle it.

Her feet slowly trudged the short distance across the deck to the very edge of the maaju pool. She stared down, feeling the air from the pool. Without a second thought, she jumped. She fell quickly, and let her suit kick it. She flew in wild, reckless patterns, nothing that resembled a Ri Majon in the least. She flew to rid herself of the weight that she felt sure would crush if she breathed too hard. She veered one way, and then another, speeding through the wall, propelling herself off the walls. Perhaps if she flew fast enough and long enough, it'd go away.

Still, the feeling persisted. It overwhelmed her, and she bit the inside of her mouth. The taste of copper she soon tasted as she let the dam burst that had built up. She didn't care of anyone was around or heard her. They were all with Mamiina. She'd carefully made herself scarce when the Sibyllae had gotten together to go to the chapel. She couldn't… she couldn't face Mamiina. She couldn't face another dead body of someone she loved. She couldn't face seeing a comrade that she'd seen alive and well hours before lying cold and still. It wasn't natural to her. Tempus Spatium…there was no Tempus Spatium. Tempus Spatium wouldn't have done this.

She cried, letting the tears run down her face. She couldn't think clearly and relied only on her senses to keep her from crashing into the wall. Mamiina should have lived; she shouldn't have died in this place. If Aaeru had been stronger… she could have done something. If she would have disobeyed the order not to fly from the start, perhaps she could, she could have… She wiped at her eyes, trying to clear her line of vision.

Aaeru pushed forward, trying to clear her mind. She couldn't help but continue to cry and fly wild patterns. Any Ri Majon she began to attempt to form ended up being dissolved shortly after being created. Aaeru could not form and finish anything she attempted. Her head pounded, and she put on speed. If only Grandpa had been right. If she could leave this world…her body conformed to her wishes as she continued to maneuver in the pool, beginning yet another Ri Majon.

Her body formed the quick curves, following her heart's desire. As the final trail finished, she propelled herself upward. She had the feeling she wasn't alone, and she didn't want someone else to see her failed attempts. She already felt as though she had failed enough. She used the air to exit the pool and stood, gathering herself together. She would not look, knowing now that Neviril had been the presence she felt. Of all Chor Tempest, it would have to be Neviril. She spoke softly to Neviril, sniffling between her words, which immediately gave away her mood.

As Neviril questioned her, the thoughts came pouring back. Her voice wavered as she spoke, threatening to break at any moment. Regrets surfaced and became spoken word. Thoughts became words spoken in broken sentences. Before Neviril could place the blame back onto herself, Aaeru stopped her. She would not let someone else do that. Angrily, she turned, facing Neviril, speaking with fervor. The tears built up in her eyes and her body shook as she spoke. The dam broke and she sobbed, breaking down in front of the one person she had wanted to appear strong for. She sobbed loudly, falling to her knees, letting the grief free, letting it wash over her.

The tears continued to flow and she sobbed, her tears splashing onto the floor. It didn't matter if Neviril saw her cry; none of that mattered anymore. She took a deep breath as the tears flowed. She couldn't… wouldn't… "I have to live," she declared, speaking her resolve. She stated it once more when Neviril asked her to clarify, sitting up. Then she choked, the tears coming once more. The echo of footsteps came closer, and then she saw Neviril fall to her knees beside her.

Aaeru said nothing as Neviril reached out and placed her hand over her own. Aaeru's body responded by turning her own hand, and intertwining her fingers with Neviril's. She fed on the warmth and comfort from the simple connection as Neviril tightened the grip. She stared into the distance, eyes focused on nothing in particular. No words were exchanged between them, and none were needed. The only sound was Aaeru's sniffling.

She rose to her feet, releasing Neviril's hand. It felt odd not to have the connection and she clenched and unclenched her fist. "I…I have to go change," she said softly.

Neviril looked up at her backside. "Aaeru…"

Aaeru didn't reply, going to change back into her outfit. Neviril watched her go, and then stood, following her. When Aaeru exited the room, Neviril stood there, waiting for her. She looked at Aaeru, eyes piercing into her. Aaeru looked away, unable to look into them. She rubbed her arm before heading into the hallway. Neviril stayed by her side, following.

Late that night, Aaeru curled up in her bed, falling asleep sometime later. Shortly thereafter she had kicked away her sheets, and her body had curled up into a fetal position. She slept fitfully, restless after all that had happened. Flying with the rest of Chor Tempest to offer their final prayers and tributes to Mamiina had helped to clear her mind, but it had not cleared her heart. Her face bunched up every few moments, as though she was lost in a dream or nightmare that she couldn't escape from.

The bed creaked as another body sat, hands lightly gripping the edge of the bed. Neviril looked over at Aaeru, wanting to reach out, but feeling as though she couldn't. She couldn't do so, not yet. Instead, she reached for the sheets that Aaeru had kicked away, and pulled them over her sleeping body. She gingerly tucked the covers around Aaeru's shoulders, smiling when the girl snuggled into the sudden warmth. She reached out to tuck the sheets around her neck, and frowned slightly when Aaeru moved her head, trapping Neviril's hand.

Neviril tried to figure out how to remove her hand without waking Aaeru. She tried gently tugging her hand away, but found that she could not do so without giving a hard tug. She would have to wait until Aaeru moved her head or changed positions. Quietly she sat in her spot, patiently waiting. It appeared as though Aaeru was comfortable as she was. Perhaps she'd have to help things along.

Gently, she reached out with her other hand and lifted Aaeru's head slowly, just enough to pull her hand away. As soon as she did, she noticed Aaeru stirring. One eye opened, focusing on her. Neviril quickly stood, realizing that Aaeru might find it strange that she was sitting on her bed. She began to walk quickly, intent on not speaking to Aaeru about why she was in her room in the first place.

"Neviril?" came the soft whisper.

Neviril paused in her tracks. She pursed her lips, considering the idea of just continuing forward and leaving. She couldn't just do that. She turned around. "Yes?"

"You couldn't sleep?"

Shaking her head, Neviril replied, "No, I couldn't." She still couldn't explain why she had come here, and hoped that Aaeru wouldn't ask. However, knowing Aaeru…

"Why did you come here?"

"I don't…I'm not sure," she confessed.

Aaeru sat up in bed, looking over at Neviril. She was quiet for a few moments, rubbing her eyes. "Oh… did you want to stay?"

Neviril wanted to run. She would have rather pushed Aaeru away again, but something inside of her told her that wasn't the wisest of ideas anymore. She had to face the demons inside of her, and now was a good time to start. "All right." She turned around, and made her way back toward the bed.

Smiling, Aaeru scooted over. She couldn't believe that Neviril had agreed to stay. She watched as Neviril sat on the bed and then laid back. Aaeru did the same, pulling the sheets over the both of them. Both of them lay there, speaking no more. They did not touch, and the gap of a few inches might as well have been miles. Neviril merely stared at the ceiling, hands by her side. The silence was hard for Aaeru to stand. Neviril looked more uncomfortable than anything. Aaeru wanted to do something for her, but she was uncertain as to what. She would not repeat the scene on the Messis.

Instead, she reached out, searching for Neviril's hand under the sheet. She intertwined their fingers and squeezed softly. Neviril looked over at her, and Aaeru smiled. Aaeru closed her eyes, relishing the simple connection between them once more. Neviril could only watch as Aaeru drifted off to sleep. The grip Aaeru had on her hand loosened, but she did not let go. She pulled their hands up and kissed Aaeru's knuckles before closing her own eyes. When each of them would wake the next morning, they would find that their hands still kept them paired.


End file.
